Is Happiness Really a Choice???

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Get Happy
Olivander / Foter / CC BY-NC-SA

What makes you happy? I mean really, truly happy. Is it all the stuff your money can buy for you? Is it the people in your life? The people you love? Ask yourself this question…if you were to lose EVERYTHING you have tomorrow…your home, job, bank account, material possessions…would you continue to be happy? What about the loss of a loved one? Do you continue to live fully or feel guilty for continuing your life on the earth? Do you let those things and situations define you and your happiness?

Who is responsible for your happiness? Your significant other? Your parents? Your children? Of course not. YOU are responsible for your happiness…only YOU! You have to choose to be happy…each and every day.

Happiness is an inside job. ~William Arthur Ward

Where is this happiness we have been striving for? It has been residing inside of us all along. We did not know because we did not look for it there. Some people live their entire lives and never come to this realization. It’s all about being present and grateful for what you have. So many people look “out there” for happiness. They do not realize that happiness is “in here”…it’s inside each and every one of us. Some of us choose not to acknowledge it and we stay in our misery. We tell ourselves we will be happy when________ (you can fill in the blank). We are always looking for the next best thing. We tend to keep ourselves so busy “doing” things so we do not have to think about it. We put on a show that we are happy and that everything is wonderful but that is just a show…a fake façade.

In order to be happy…you MUST live in the present. You cannot dwell on the past…and you cannot live in anticipation of the future. You have to be fully present and grateful for all that you have now. This moment is all we ever have. Think about it…right now, this very moment…is all there is. After five minutes…what is it? It is now. Half an hour later…it is now. Now is all there is.

The past is a ghost, the future a dream and all we ever have is now. ~Bill Cosby

Some people think that they would be happier somewhere else…in a different job, home, relationship, etc. They are surprised to find that when they achieve those things…their “happiness” is only temporary. So they begin to feel that they would be “happier” in a different job, home, relationship, etc. They go through life this way…never truly being happy. Always looking for happiness outside of themselves…and of course, they never find it. Their “happiness” issue is not out there in any of those things…it resides within them. It is not until they isolate those issues and work on those issues, that they will be able to find true happiness. When you are truly happy, all of those exterior things are just icing on the cake. But without them…you would still be the same happy person that you are.

Smile
seyed mostafa zamani / Foter / CC BY

 

 

There will always be situations in life that we have no control over. What we do have control over is how we react to those situations. Just like you, I have had many obstacles in my life. I have lost many people that I love, I have lost my worldly belongings (a few times over), had less than a dollar in my bank account for many, many months…been jobless…even briefly homeless. Although they were difficult times…it did not stop me from my inner peace and happiness. I always felt very blessed and felt as if I had more than I needed. That is not to say that I was not upset or grieving during these times…I surely was. The difference is that I processed my grief quickly and began to see the bigger picture…to see what lesson the Universe was trying to teach me.

You cannot be happy when you are trying to live up to someone else’s expectations of who you are. You cannot be happy when you are living to try and impress others with your “things”. You cannot be happy when you do not love yourself unconditionally. You cannot be truly happy when you do not accept yourself for who you are.

If you want to be happy, be.  ~Leo Tolstoy

No “thing” can make you happy. No “person” can make you happy. So many relationships fail due to people believing that their happiness can be created by someone else…that someone else is responsible for their happiness. If you are in a relationship, and you truly believe that, it will be very difficult for your relationship to succeed. To put that kind of pressure on another human being…for them to be responsible for YOUR happiness…who can live up to that?  The truth is that WE are responsible for our OWN happiness. If you are not happy…it is YOUR responsibility to find out why. It is YOUR responsibility to work out your issues. It is YOUR responsibility to choose to be happy.

So…for this moment…choose to be happy. Find something that gives you joy. Think about that…focus on that. Feel it…hold the energy of that thought, that emotion. Keep your thoughts and energy positive. If you are not used to being in a state of happiness, this may take some practice. Try positive affirmations if you need to. Tell yourself…I am happy and grateful for all that I have. Say it until you believe it. Practice, practice, practice. Soon you will be doing it without even thinking about it. It will become second nature. Positive change will raise your vibration and attract more positive things into your life.

             You’ve always had the power, my dear.  You’ve had it all along. ~The Wizard of Oz

You see, it really is up to you. Do you want to be happy? Do you want to put out positive, happy vibrational energy? Then DO IT!!! That is what the Universe will return to you. You hold the power…no one else…YOU. It is your choice; make the choice…each and every day. 

 

 

What is your passion? Check out my article:

Have you found your passion?

 

Trying to heal from past hurts? Check out my article:

Forgiveness is a One-Way Street

 

Do you want to be happy? Check out this article:

How to Increase Your Happiness Now

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Ruth SoltmanLightWorkers World Author Ruth Soltman (7 Posts)

Ruth is a free spirit, lightworker, freelance writer and poet. She has an empathic understanding and deep compassion for the human condition. Her latest project is an inspirational book about her spiritual journey that will be published in early 2014. Ruth is a Human Rights Advocate and has varied interests including travel, nature, and energy healing. You can like her business page at Angelsworks Publishing www.facebook.com/angelworks.publishing.